14 December 2005

Lunatics and their attraction to Holy Land (part II)

Seems as though everyone wants to have a musical written about themselves these days, some even make some pretty serious life changing shifts to qualify. This dork even went so far as to change his name to get in the limelight. Salamat, Andrew McDonald (aka Muncie). Away with ya lad. Here's Ynet's ticker tape tale of an ISMnik getting a boot up the Gaza Pass:

Pro-Palestinian activist to be deported
A British pro-Palestinian activist will be deported
from Israel for defying a ban prohibiting him from entering the country. Andrew McDonald was arrested two weeks ago for entering Israel under a different name and overstaying his visa. McDonald was arrested and deported four
years ago for barricading himself in the house of a suicide bomber. (Efrat Weiss)

Looks like scrappy little Andrew locked horns with the IDF once too many, and now the British tax payer gets to foot the bill for his repatriation.

As the Goon outlined in his post below, we get quite a few freaks, anoraks and an assortment of otherwise unclassified turds, that appear on our doorstep regularly - the Jerusalem Syndrome sufferers, the enlightened resurrected Jesuses that pound the old city's pavement desperately seeking their flock of disciples. Most of these freaks got sifted thoroughly and efficiently in the past, with minimum fuss, ending up on the next flight home.

In a concerted effort to filter out the remaining silt that perpetually drifts to our shores, a Personality Profile fitting most types was created for our first line of defense - the stern yet insurmountably sexy ladies of Israeli Immigration. With a few short questions they were able to separate the cookies from the crumbs. However, that left us with another small yet persistent challenge.

The ISM spends a lot of time and effort in training their emissary rookies, furnishing them with well scripted background stories, and methods to throw the ladies of immigration off the scent. While in the past the ISM were relatively successful in getting their activists through Israel's ports of entry, their scripting has had the effect of raising the bar a notch. A solution was devised; the technology funded by the Elder's R&D department, has since been piloted and Beta tested by the fine ladies behind the immigration counter and has been operational for some time.

We'd like to point out one consideration for those budding enthusiastic ISM rookies, on the way to our shores. If you do manage to get past our immigration staff, just be aware that you may not be as clever as you think you are. Andrew was in fact unwittingly an Israeli agent. He was a beacon in the night, a blip on our monitors, a pointer that brought down a house of cards.

Thanks Andrew, you've outlived your usefulness.