18 September 2006

Manuel II: I meant the Jews!

Byzantine emperor Manuel II Paleologus issued a correction that returned peace and tranquility to the world.

Interviewed in his summer residence near Constantinople, while he was tending to his praised collection of orchids, overseeing his two favorite scythian slave gardeners, Manuel II spoke truthfully about his genuine mistake.

"Of course, I didn't mean to say Muhammad - what nonsense! I was going to say Samuel - you know, that Jewish prophet. This one is real bad penny. I don't know what happened to me. It must have been the kippers I ate at breakfast that day, something was wrong about them. I have already ordered the breakfast cook to be strangled. With extreme prejudice."

In related news: the Muslim world grudgingly accepts the apology. "Did I say I want him beheaded? Surely I meant befriended - in the sense that he is going to embrace Islam, the most peaceful religion in existence. This son of a ... I mean, our dear Manuel II was clearly enthralled by the Zionists that insinuated themselves into his household. But we'll help him to get rid of these sons of pigs," said the Sultan to the press this morning.

Still, some of the more zealous Muslim groups are not satisfied by the state of affairs. "All this does not amount to a definitive apology," declared Egyptian Pasha. "We want that infidel to crawl on all four to Mecca before we consider the incident forgotten," he added after some mulling.

More news to follow...

Cross-posted on Yourish.com