15 September 2006

Down with Byzantine Empire?

The unfortunate statement made by Byzantine emperor Manuel II Paleologus angers the Muslims all over the world.

Show me just what Muhammad brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached.


The provocative statement caused a widespread outrage.

Byzantine embassies in Damascus, Jakarta, Tripoli were set on fire, in other areas were set on fire Byzantine-looking foreigners that had been caught in the streets.

Effigies of the emperor Manuel II were burned (28 cases), stomped (43 cases) and served as spittoons (175 cases). Starbucks franchise was reported burning in Riad, but it may be just the smell of burned beans, and all the bets are off regarding this case.

Ambassador of Saudi Arabia in Constantinople was urgently called home "for consultations". His request for half an hour delay to allow him to finish the delicious seafood dinner with homegrown couscous was refused.

President Ahmadinejad was reported to blame the Zionists for the outrageous statement. "First they set up shop in the middle of Muslim land. Then they provoke us by these blasphemous cartoons, and now this. Is there a limit to Zionist chutzpa? Millions shahids will march on Constantinople."

Professors Petras, Mearsheimer and Walt published an article that conclusively proves that the latest outrage was caused by a Mossad mole close to the emperor Manuel's chambermaid. The degree of closeness will be a subject for the follow-on article. There was no response neither from Jerusalem or from AIPAC whose sinister role in this Mossad operation is covered in the article.

There are unconfirmed reports that the Turkish army is brought to the state of highest alert and even rumors of fires over Constantinople, however the only black and white picture comes from Reuters:

There are some doubts about the authenticity of the trees in the background.

The rumors about some Germanic tribes offering support to the emperor's position are also unconfirmed and may be blamed on translation issues. However, the papal Swiss guard was beefed up by some elite units from Zurich, trained in fierce facial expression.

More to follow...

Cross-posted on Yourish.com