06 April 2006

Hamas leader: Jews controlling U.S. Christianity

WND people have interviewed one of the Hamas chiefs, he of the colored beard:

Known as the Hamas foremost thinker, Mohammad Abu Tir is apparently sure that he has got wise to one of the most secret Elders' conspiracies:

"Even the churches where the Americans pray are led by Jews who were converted to Christianity, but they were converted to keep controlling the Americans," Mohammad Abu Tir, the number two Hamas terrorist in the newly formed Palestinian Authority government said during an exclusive interview from his home yesterday with top radio host Rusty Humphries and WND Jerusalem bureau chief Aaron Klein.

The naivete of Hamas scientists literally leaves me breathless. How many times should we explain that everything is controlled by the Elders?

Specifically about Christianity: this conspiracy was conceived, planned and carried out more than two thousand years ago. The main instrument of this conspiracy (which is not a conspiracy anymore, but Hamas still cannot realize this) was a Jew popularly known as Jesus. Anyone who ever heard about the so called "immaculate conception" should at least suspect that the Elders have had a hand (so to speak) in this deal.

So, dear Mohammad, you must understand that we, the Jooz, do not need to control the churches any more than they are already controlled.

Oh, and regarding these Jews "who were converted to keep controlling the Americans": we do indeed keep an eye on goings on in the churches, but it is just routine monitoring. And it is not performed by Jews - we employ the semi-sentient lizards to do it. They can be easily identified, just check out the people who (seemingly) fall asleep during the sermon.

Cross-posted on Yourish.com