23 February 2012

It is not the jeans, stupid...

As seen at Elder of Ziyon's place:

A member of the Sawarka Bedouin tribe, Muhammad al-Mani'i, who was interviewed on the show, also accused Israel of manufacturing "toxic" jeans that cause infertility. He claimed the Jewish state sells them to Arab countries reduce population growth.
Mr al-Mani'i blames the magnets:
The tribesman said that the denim pants are equipped with belts that contain a magnet, which is the source of their toxic powers.
Of course, it is not some steenking magnets, nor is it the jeans. At least, not directly. It is that thing called "zipper" that became so popular lately with the free trade, globalization and all that jazz. Now the zipper came to Bedouin tribes of Sinai peninsula, with some side effects, apparently.

Lacking proper preparation for use of zipper-equipped jeans, I have only two measures to offer:
  • The unfortunate ones who are already suffering the aftereffects of careless zippering: read carefully this handy guide and follow the instructions to the letter.
  • New owners of zipper-equipped jeans: do not touch the zipper at all prior to getting acquainted with the device. 
  • Stay unzipped for the first month or three. 
  • Test your zippering talents first on mannequins - or best friends.
Besides, what is wrong with good old Jellabiya?

Oh, and another reminder:

8 comments:

Shaun Downey (Jams O Donnell) said...

I woild have thought they had cause for complaint if there had been razors for zippers .... not that ordinary zippers cannot be a threat especially to those of us who have not undergone Bris Millah (is that right?)

KatieNorcross said...

Funny.  Americans buy special magnets to increase sperm production not to decrease it.  It must be something else then.  Or inferior magnets.  Damn those sneaky Joos!

SnoopyTheGoon said...

 I believe that a closer version is Brit Milah, but no matter - I know what you are talking about ;-)

SnoopyTheGoon said...

 The polarity of the magnets may be the opposite of the ones used to increase sperm production...

peterthehungarian said...

Must be some equalising natural or divine forces at work. If you have a long what's this you are seriosly endangered, but if you are not in the pornstar category then no worries...

SnoopyTheGoon said...

 Yep, it's a valid point. You should take into account what somebody (I believe it was François Rabelais) said about the extraordinary size of "what's this" of monks, due to their habits (in the sense of dress) which don't restrict the growth. Same with the jellabiya that works on the same principle. So a Bedouin adult switching from jellabiya to jeans is usually endangered, apparently.

Dick said...

Ah, those rollicking Mooslims. There's a new conspiracy to deprive them of something every minute!

SnoopyTheGoon said...

 Right, and this something is very important this time, even vital, I would say.