02 May 2012

Johan Galtung - another cause for celebration at the Elders' place

Instead of going into dry and boring explanations  of the case, I've decided to quote some excerpts from an internal memo sent to I..., the Mind Control Dept. chief,  Elders' HQ from his immediate superior U....


Dear I...,

It is with a sense of great achievement, delight and general well-being that I address this memo to you. Under my helmsmanship, boundless wisdom and shining field guidance that... [partly omitted*], your department has achieved what was considered impossible under the previous management of our immortal [partly omitted]... You have taken this man:


Notice how likeable he is - every youngster would gladly have him for a grandfather. Or grandmother, if you want to reflect upon that colorful shirt... anyway, were was I? Yes, this likeable man who - and I prefer to quote here, from the abominable Ha'Aretz:
Professor Galtung, 82-years-old, is one of the founders of the discipline called “Peace Studies and Conflict Resolution,” as well as a founder of the international Peace Research Institute in Oslo. He is considered well-respected sociological researcher, has been awarded many prizes, and is the author of over a thousand articles and over a hundred books.
He is something, this professor, isn't he? And you have taken this man, whose name reverberates in the halls of many institutions of higher learning, this... [partly omitted for same reason] and in less than three months, using the last ... [technicalities omitted] of mind control, succeeded to turn him into a raving, drooling and dribbling psychopath! I will quote only a few of his new "beliefs":
  • Claimed that a possible connection exists between the terrorist responsible for the massacre of children in Norway last summer, and the Mossad.
  • Says that The Jews control U.S. media, and divert for the sake of Israel.
  • Pointed out that one of the factors behind the anti-Semitic sentiment that led to Auschwitz was the fact that Jews held influential positions in German society.
  • Recommended reading “The Protocols of the Elders of Zion”.
  • Considers that Freemasons organization has Jewish origins.
There is more, but it is enough to show your triumph, for which I congratulate you again. Now, from a reputable peace merchant he turned into a revolting run-of-the-mill antisemitic conspiracy freak whose name will be never taken seriously again in the above mentioned scientific circles.

Good job, I..., and, as an expression of the Elders' gratitude, for the next Passover matzos you will be granted a vial of AB Rh Negative gentile baby's blood - a rare treatment for an Elders' member below grade... [omitted].

[Here some routine instructions and the list of next candidates for mind control rays are omitted]

Keep up the good work.

U...


(*) It must be mentioned at this point that U... has recently returned from an arduous assignment of many years as a chief tyrant of a remote warmongering tribe that will remain unnamed.

18 comments:

GideonSwort said...

So Goon, I need Galtung to do a paper on UFO carbon emissions and environmental impact. Who has access to his remote mind controller?

I also need to know who authorised the lobotomy on this geriatric, his MTBF can't exceed 12 months surely. 

Also, I wan't my company UFO upgraded to an iPhone compatible version with Bluetooth tech and leather seats. And while your'e at it pushing papers, get me a new EZ Lobotomy kit. 
  

KatieNorcross said...

82?  Guess who will be meeting his maker soon.  I wonder how he will explain his life to that Judge?

KatieNorcross said...

 Everyone knows that UFOs run on Unicorn Farts.

SnoopyTheGoon said...

There was no scalpel involved, I can assure you, only pure clean mind control rays. And re the UFOs - consider the request submitted.

SnoopyTheGoon said...

He will blame Zionists in all these issues, it must be clear.

SnoopyTheGoon said...

Yes, that's why Al Bore wants to kill all unicorns.

Shaun Downey (Jams O Donnell) said...

It's all utter nonsense every one knows that the elders ensure that over 70% of Mossad's resources are devoted to stealing my biros and random socks

David All said...

Do these Zionist mind control devices work on everyone or do they specifically work on those who are senior citizens?

OT: Have to report a security leak from the Elders' archives. A recent episode of "Ancient Aliens" on the History 2 cable channel reported that unamed Aliens may have been responsible for wiping out the dinosaurs some 65 million years ago. While no names were mentioned it seems that some people are talking about things that should be kept secret!

SnoopyTheGoon said...

The percentage dropped down since we got that sock-control machine. Biros, though, still present a lot of surprises.

SnoopyTheGoon said...

No no, David, senior citizens present a tougher target, having not very flexible minds. Youngsters are done with in a jiffy.

As for dinosaurs - yes, that was one of the first cases of Zionist involvement, not a secret anymore.

GideonSwort said...

Yes Katie, but we supplement these with Dodo droppings for better acceleration. 

GideonSwort said...

Thanx Boss.As a show of gratitude, I'll volunteer to upgrade RedKen to Numpty dribbling Moron Muppet Ver 2.01 rev. Lon2013.

SnoopyTheGoon said...

Oh... I thought he is already... OK.

GideonSwort said...

Your Socks contain fissure quality secretions and provide excellent boost to our ZioHyperDrive units, and increase NOx emissions significantly. Your support for the cause is appreciated. You will be refunded with M&S vouchers for standard issue St.Michael's ZioExport products. 

Shaun Downey (Jams O Donnell) said...

 It heartens me to know that my socks are going to a good cause!

Shaun Downey (Jams O Donnell) said...

 Just leave my fountain pens alone!

Dick Stanley said...

I knew without reading, just from seeing the fellow's precious little necklace and his oh-so-fashionable glasses, that he was a flake.

SnoopyTheGoon said...

No one said a professor can't be a flake. In fact... no, I better stop here ;-)