24 May 2012

A case of creative price management and other wisecracks

California, apparently, suffers from surplus of weed. The solution was simple:

Authorities say three and a half tons of marijuana have been found floating in the ocean off Southern California.

Idahoans, on the other hand, think that they are first in everything:
A southwest Idaho thief covered his head with underwear - briefs - as he and his partner broke into a coffee shop Tuesday and stole a safe.
OK, but what does Jason Wilson, the owner of that shop* think about it?
"Who robs something with underwear on their head?," Wilson said.
Oh, man, how far out you are: these are simply Bar Refaeli's missing undies!

(*) The shop is called Big Star Coffee in a place called Fruitland (!).

Moose on the Loose Triggers Police Chase in Utah

It (the headline) started so well, and then... something, possibly related to police, is missing. I don't know: booze, shmooze, cabooze ...

The next one looked hauntingly similar to something else:
KODIAK, Alaska -- Dozens of fly swatters bearing logos of collegiate and professional sports teams have been washing up on the beaches of an Alaska island.
Then I remembered the previous story:
Since 2007, 11 human feet have washed up on the shore near British Columbia—and no one knows why.
These two must be related, I suggest. First the feet in expensive footwear ("Eleven feet, some right and some left, all clad in buoyant running shoes..."). Then fly swatters bearing logos of collegiate sports... does anybody recall a disappearance of a college fly swatter team?


KatieNorcross said...

The glut of marijuana explains California to a tee.  No real news there.

We've had the underwear bomber why not the underwear robber.  I do hope they were at least clean.

The fly swatters might be from Japan and the Tsunami.  Many unusual items have washed ashore there.  I suspect that Jimmy Hoffa might be next.

Feet and only feet.  A serial killer with a foot fetish?  Kinky!

SnoopyTheGoon said...

"I do hope they were at least clean." Not necessarily if the robber was male.