30 June 2011

Ami Isseroff RIP: the heart of a real Zionist stopped


It is a sad day indeed for all those who knew and appreciated one of the most unusual and brave people in the Internet community.

When a blogger mentions someone in blogging "business", it is an accepted practice to connect the name to a link. When Ami is mentioned, it is simply impossible to choose which one of the sites Ami kept and nurtured to link. This or this or this or... And all of the sites were not just a whim or a temporary storage for something to read and forget. Ami was one of the most prolific and talented writers I have seen in my life, producing two or three new articles a day wasn't rare for him.

And when one mentions the Internet communities he created and kept alive, his correspondence with anyone who needed assistance, his readiness with advice and/or criticism, it is impossible to see how mere twenty four hours a day were enough for what he has done. Day after day, year after year, doing an impossible amount of work, without being paid, without being honored or appreciated by powers that be, fighting enemies without and within with the same fierceness and bravery that he fought his physical frailty. A demanding and exacting man, Ami was demanding of his friends and partners, but much more demanding of himself.

I had the honor of personal acquaintance with Ami. It didn't happen because of Ami's Internet activities. The company I worked for was looking for a good technical writer, and Ami answered our ad. The first appearances could be deceptive, and none more than in Ami's case. His small stature, his rumpled clothes and sometimes unclear speech (it became obvious quite soon that it's Ami's frail heart, leaving him frequently gasping for air, that is the cause) - all this was forgotten in a few minutes, and I was captivated by Ami the person. And in a short while I have started to learn from Ami how to do my job better - while being an experienced software developer, which Ami never was. I didn't know then about Ami's Zionist activities, getting wise to these only in a few years and only then getting to really appreciate the enormous work Ami performed daily.     

Ami was a real Zionist. His love of Zion wasn't qualified. He didn't live in the world built on religious fervor, nor in one full of nationalistic rhetoric. Coming from the left, he didn't hide his rejection of the (part of the) left's anti-Zionist trends and his disillusionment with their feel-good empty slogans. On the other hand, his Zionism, his love of Israel were never blind, never of the "my country, right or wrong" kind.

And, to his last moment, Ami remained a believer in peace - not in the fake peace process we lost our belief in, but real and tangible peace. I looked for a link to one of the Ami's articles and a quote to complete this post, and this will be the best and the most appropriate:


For the Zionist movement, peace has always been the only option, but it has never really been on the menu before. Peace may not be on the menu this time, either. But if we are consistent in pursuing our goal, it will be, one day.

Peace requires patience. It will be an ugly baby when it is born. It will not look anything like the utopia described in first paragraphs of this article, just as in 1948 our economy did not resemble the Israeli economy of today, and the Jewish Legion of World War I did not resemble the IDF of today.
He didn't live to see peace coming, but it was always in his heart, the big heart of a real mensch. And when peace eventually comes, it will be to some extent because of his efforts to make it real and tangible.

Rest in peace, Ami, and may your memory be blessed.

North Korea to Head U.N. Conference on Disarmament

This is not all that surprising:

On Tuesday, the United Nations again made itself an international laughing stock – except perhaps to the American taxpayers who continue to foot 22 percent of the bill – by appointing North Korea chair of the U.N. Conference on Disarmament.
And I am not at all sure that UN's goal was to make itself an international laughing stock. After all, they are pretty consistent and insistent.

It's a pity Pol Pot is dead. He would have made a swell UN chief, I think.

Finally: Ben Bernanke did good by me. Hooray!

Well, this here blog didn't skim on adoration and ululation of our good man in charge of the Feds. And here, at last, comes remuneration of our considerable effort (click to enlarge and envy):


Better late than never, they say. They are right.

Please don't disturb me with requests for emergency financial assistance. I am going to read the attached message now. Bye.

29 June 2011

Knokke police spokesperson: kikes are OK - no complaints about them

You would hardly know what that word in the headline means: I mean "Knokke". Well, its' a city in Flemish part of Belgium. The story starts and ends there, and I warmly recommend that you read it here, it's not that long. I really wouldn't copy it, letting Philosemite tell it in full.

Now I want you to pay attention to a small part of the whole:

Joods Actueel [Antwerp-based Jewish magazine] has contacted the Knokke police spokesperson. Inspector Vaneenoghe formally declared that Jews cause no problems and that there are no police records or complaints about the conduct of the Jews who stay at the resort.
Phenomenal answer. The only thing that comes to mind is a story from eternal and incomparable The Good Soldier Svejk by Jaroslav Hašek (I don't have an English copy handy, so apologies for poor job done by Google and I):
- It happened during Captain Adamichek's time. Adamichek was an extremely lethargic man. In the office, he sat quietly with a look of a lunatic and stared into space, as if to say: "F...k it all" G-d knows what he was thinking during the battalion report. One day a soldier from eleventh company came to report a complaint: that one ensign Dauerling called him "Czech pig" in the street.  Before the war, this soldier was a bookbinder, a working man, and maintained a sense of national dignity.

"Mmm... yes, there we are ..." - murmured captain Adamichek (he always spoke very quietly). " He said this last evening in the street? Should check whether you were allowed to leave the barracks... Abtreten!"

After a while captain Adamichek summoned the complainant. "It was found" - he said quietly, - " that on that day you were allowed to leave the barracks until ten o'clock at night. Therefore, you do not incur punishment ... Abtreten!"
I hope you see the parallel... if not, well, too bad.

28 June 2011

A new kind of Bigfoot - a Toilet Bigfoot - discovered and captured in Colorado

Uses tarpaulin for clothing, hides in toilet tanks, seeks contact with humans.

Details.

Update: Colorado Bigfoot captured, study commenced!

Danny Seaman is out, but...

Yes, the The Government Press Office (GPO) got a new chief last September: Oren Helman, a former political adviser to Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu who most recently worked for a lobbying firm. Whatever, you would say, nothing could possibly be worse than the ex-chief, Danny Seaman. While the appointment of Mr Helman caused some waves in the media, as could be gathered from the linked above JP article, subsequent press on the man was much more positive. I quietly hoped that the whole GPO business could be considered closed and forgotten.

Apparently not:

Israel's Government Press Office issued a letter Sunday to foreign journalists, warning them that participating in the upcoming flotilla sailing to Gaza is illegal under Israeli law, and could result in anyone who joins the convoy being barred from Israel for up to 10 years.

The letter, signed by GPO director Oren Helman, states that the flotilla "is a dangerous provocation that is being organized by western and Islamic extremist elements to aid Hamas."
So, after all the spirit of Danny Seaman is still strong in GPO office, ain't it? Punishing reporters for doing their job is a typical Seaman's act, making GPO and, by extension, Israel, an easy target for "sympathetic" foreign press. Here is an example from The Guardian. Enjoy.

But, on the other hand, we have a quick reversal of the idea.
The Israeli government has dropped threats to deport foreign journalists and to impose a 10-year ban on those journalists traveling to Gaza on an activist flotilla, said a statement from the prime minister's office Monday.
So it very well could be that Oren Helman was made a victim of another trial balloon sent out by Bibi, his chief (GPO reports directly to PM), who is past master of zigging and zagging depending on the press he gets.

No matter who was pulling the ropes, it still stinks to high heaven.

When you want to be clever


I have to say that I was flabbergasted by this pop-up from Gmail that appeared while trying to send a message. The words "I have attached" indeed appeared in the said mail, but not in the sense that Google, in its growing storage of wisdom, detected.

What's next? Google and Hotmail trying to write e-mails for their clients from scratch? I shudder at the thought.

27 June 2011

Z-ranha first time in action: sabotages Gaza flotilla ship

Here it comes, from Haaretz (but of course):

One of the ships due to participate in the Gaza flotilla was deliberately tampered with while it was docked in Greece’s Piraeus port, Gaza flotilla activists told Haaretz on Monday.

The ship, due to carry Greek, Norwegian, and Swedish passengers to Gaza, was found with its propeller shaft broken, the ship’s spokesman Israeli activist Dror Feiler told Haaretz.
Of course, curious reader will want to know: how exactly the heinous act of sabotage was carried out?

So read this. And don't say you weren't warned in advance. Anti-Zionists who put their feet in the azure Mediterranean should be aware from now on that no foot, no matter how bad does it smell (or not at all) is sacred. Our schools of Z-ranhas are on the prowl.

And re another detail:
Even though the problem can be fixed, it is still unclear how long it would take, especially with Greece’s recently declared general strike on Tuesday and Wednesday.
And who, do you think, caused all that turmoil in Greece?

I am gonna to take a break. To cackle darkly for half an hour or so...

Update:  Z-ranhas take a bite out of Irish ship now. Another success.

The eternal dilemma of Gideon Levy

Gideon Levy in his latest missive A society is judged by the way it treats its prisoners left his readers with a delicious ambiguity to resolve. The last paragraph of the article reads:

To many Israelis, that is not enough. They want more suffering and vengeance. The sight of the makloubeh the Palestinian prisoners cooked for themselves in their narrow cells infuriates them more than our appearance in the mirror. A society is judged by the way it treats its prisoners. And yet, if I believed that this collective punishment could bring relief to Gilad, maybe I would have joined them.
Who is it precisely Mr Levy wants to join? If it's Israelis, he seems to be late. If it's the prisoners, how could it be arranged quickly?

26 June 2011

Hugo Chávez 'in critical condition' in Cuban hospital: liposuction gone wrong?

I chose this article for the picture:

The three subjects look in similar state of health and, in my humble, should start learning harp playing (or whatever musical instrument is allowed up there) pronto.

Anyway, the rumor and the hope attached could be wrong:
After two weeks of silence, the Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez, said on Twitter that he is in good health.
Now I hate Twitter even more than before.

PETA holds anti-fur demonstration - and doesn't make me angry!

PETA (pronounced like pita, but much less useful) usually tends to rile me by their shenanigans. But this latest act of theirs was rather confusing to me.

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) holds an anti-fur demonstration in Washington, DC

Normally, once looking at the aftermath of another PETA stupid or disgraceful or offensive (or all of the above) action, I would be pissed off and running to the keyboard to express all that ire.

Now I don't feel any of the above, and, although, to be completely frank, my heart doesn't exactly bleed for the animals in question, neither does it call for an anti-PETA outcry.

The only thing I know is that I want to be caged... go figure...

Methinks an expert opinion of Gorilla Bananas ought to settle that one.

U.S. Department of Education: when the going gets tough...

the tough get going, as they say. And apparently, no one is as tough as Department of Education toughs.

Wright said an officer grabbed him by the neck and led him outside on his front lawn. "He had his knee on my back and I had no idea why they were there," Wright said.
That to start with.
According to Wright, officers also woke his three young children, ages 3, 9, and 11, and put them in a Stockton police patrol car with him. Officers then searched his house. "They put me in handcuffs in that hot patrol car for six hours, traumatizing my kids," Wright said.
And, to top it all:
As it turned out, the person a team of federal agents were looking for - Wright's estranged wife Michelle - was not there.

The federal search warrant is sealed by the courts, but the copy given to Wright said the Department of Education and its Office of the Inspector General are investigating the Wrights for financial aid fraud. The search allowed for the seizure of any student financial aid documents, W2 forms and electronic communications.
So, yeah, this story kind of changes the image of Department of Education you may have naively nurtured. Think again. And imagine what Department of Health could do to you in such situation...

Via Isaac.

25 June 2011

Peter Falk, RIP

He may have not been one of the greatest, but sometimes he definitely did touch it. As these guys suggest, this would be a good example to remember him by:



RIP.

24 June 2011

Alex Jones vs DMT



I am absolutely certain that Alex Jones doesn't need no DMT - or anything else, for that matter.

Otherwise: what Lesley says: he is a nutcase, albeit a hilarious one.

P.S. Somebody asked what DMT stands for.

How to subdue a terrorist: hitherto secret standing procedure

I promise I am not going to collect the famous sentences uttered in courts, like this one. But the latest case is irresistible, besides being widely publicized.

A former security guard for the IDF chief of staff, who was accused of attempted rape and assault last year, on Sunday admitted to the allegations in the indictment, but said the alcohol he drank made him unaware of his actions that night.
That article is not recent, and today this guy found another line of defense (as heard on radio): claimed that he thought that the woman he attacked and tried to rape (sodomize by other accounts) was a terrorist. "And then I have acted according to standing procedure", he added.

Yeah, that one is uber-cool. So, the standing procedure to treat a suspected terrorist is to sodomize the heck out of him/her. Interesting...

The Council Has Spoken!

Here are this week’s full results:

Council Winners

Non-Council Winners

See you next week!

23 June 2011

Buju Banton Sentenced to 10 Years: Not an Easy Road

“It's not an easy road, many see the glamour and the glitter and think it's a bed of rose.”



Oh well, after all, Danny Glover vouched for him.

Too bad.

Dania Shumaf, the Israeli Circassian novelist


Just because.

Ingrid and Jörgen have the solution...



Via Blazing Cat Fur, with thanks.

The Boeing 747-8JK cockpit is what?

The Boeing 747-8JK cockpit is filled with pretty buttons and switches.

Please leave me alone, while I take some Advil and  lie down to have a good refreshing cry.

22 June 2011

The new Bilderberg? You decide.

I don't know how I've missed this. Apparently I was on some kind of mental vacation out there in another dimension or something. Anyway, Allen Patterson aka The Whited Sepulchre posted it under a prophetic title Pictures from the Collusion Banquet. I shall copy the picture (click on it to embiggen):


and you can read the rest in the original post. What the post lacks, I suspect, is a coherent explanation of this momentous event. This group is going to intrude in the domain that so far was wholly in the hands of the Elders, namely the world domination as we know and love it.

The only notion Allen has was:
I can think of no sane reason for the guy to Mark Zuckerberg's left to bring all of these people together.
Sorry, Allen, sanity doesn't enter the scene where world domination is concerned. The gang depicted in the picture and the amazing fact that so many people, who normally hate each other guts, agreed to share the same room, can mean only one thing: an attempt to dig under the foundations of the Elders' control of this planet. No buts about it.

But forewarned is forearmed. No worries. People who, from the first amphibious creature to brave the shore of the primordial ocean, through Neanderthal man via Illuminati, Masons, Elders, achieved the world domination (year 2000, as planned) will not be deterred by a handful of nerds.

We shall sort it out quickly.

And while we are at it: I have always suspected that all these iThings are created with one goal in mind. Which is mind control/zombification, of course. Oh well, consider it being taken care of too. As we speak.

Labour's tasteless joke policy

Everyone was getting along famously until the Livingstone question came up.
This could have been one of the "famous last words" quotes. Read the whole and ask yourself... aw, what the heck, don't ask. Because it's already answered:
Labour is in an acute danger of becoming a party of grubby charlatans.

By Nick Cohen.

21 June 2011

"As a Jew" explained

The term “asaJew” is a marker of identity politics. It says that I, the speaker, have some special authority to say what I’m going to say because of my identity. Usually identity politics is adopted by people who claim to speak for their collectivity. The “asaJew” says that non-Jews should pay special attention because they are raising an issue which is more easily seen from a Jewish point of view. So an “asa Jew” might say that Jews are able to sense or sniff antisemitism when a non-Jew might have been unaware. Jews might be sensitive to certain attitudes, figures of speech, images, to which a non-Jew might not be.

Jewish anti-Zionists give their identity politics a strange twist. Instead of claiming to represent the opinion of most of their fellow Jews, they mobilize their identity “asaJew” in order to give their oppositional view more legitimacy. They are saying to non-Jews that this or that might seem to them as though it was Antisemitic, but I, the Jew, am happy to reassure you that it isn’t.

But if the thing which the anti-Zionist asa Jew is trying to inoculate against is a thing which most Jews do find troublesome, then they employ another little twist. They claim that their Jewish identity is authentic in some way that most Jews’ identities are inauthentic. So the anti-Zionist "asaJew" may be in a tiny minority but she is claiming that she, nevertheless, is the real Jew. The ethical Jew. The critical Jew. The anti-nationalist Jew. The courageous Jew. The far-sighted Jew. And the other Jews, the herd, are actually not such real Jews; their Jewishness has been subverted by Zionism and Islamophobia and a secular unconcern with Jewish ethics.

There are two possible critiques of the “asaJew” rhetoric. One is the critique of identity politics in general, which says that you should just say what you think to be true, you should present evidence and argument, and hope that people listening will be persuaded by that – those who do this prefer to leave the claims to particular identity-based authority behind.

The other possibility is that somebody might accept that Jews in general, or Jewish communal bodies, for example, might speak with some added legitimacy. This might come from either their particular standpoint or from their claims to represent the collective. So you might think that these ways of speaking “asaJew” are more legitimate than that of the anti-Zionist Jew.

The anti-zionist Jew says “asaJew” in order to turn opinion against the majority of her fellow Jews. She wants to say that because she doesn't find something to be antisemitic, for example, and she is a Jew, and she speaks as a Jew, then they should accept that it isn't antisemitic. Because if a Jew says something isn't antisemitic then it can’t be. Right?

This is a guest post by SlingshotKiller.

Oh Joshua, Joshua...

This could yet become one of the famous court quotes:

I didn't know it was a water supply, I thought it was a sewage plant.

The curious case of the dog and rabbinical court

Since I was one of the bloggers who picked up the story, I feel obliged (but not to Mea Shearim gang) to link to Judeopundit's update.

Woof!

20 June 2011

Jolly Roger strikes again - after a decent interval

I am sure that by now the subject has almost exhausted itself. After all, how can the two or three readers of this blog be interested by the jolly Roger of NYT after a series of posts on same?

But what can I do? Really, the man defies any and all rules and/or limits put on obsessive behavior in polite society. So, after reading the new opus that again calls for rapprochement and, to be sure, "engagement" with Iran, titled (believe it or not) Iran Without Nukes, I have decided to have another go. Not that I hope for a change...

If you remember the Roger Cohen's "mea culpa" of two years ago, after a series of idiotic articles on "flawed but vibrant" democracy of Iranian Ayatollahs, crowned by the confession:

I erred in underestimating the brutality and cynicism of a regime that understands the uses of ruthlessness.
Yes, Roger has erred - again, I have to add. Of course, he didn't just up and left, not without a defiant:
I’ve argued for engagement with Iran and I still believe in it, although, in the name of the millions defrauded, President Obama’s outreach must now await a decent interval.
Obviously, the "decent interval" is over now, after two years, which is really a long time for Roger to hold his gushing waters of admiration for the "flawed but vibrant democracy". I confess I've expected a two or three months wait, but then the Arab spring happened, causing our Roger to be gushingly and tremblingly distracted, issuing another stream of admiring and, as usual, wrong predictions.

So what does Roger Cohen, the impervious and unstoppable torch bearer for Ayatollahs, say this time?
Iran is weak now, its ideology as tired as Osama Bin Laden’s, as marginal to peoples questing to reconcile their Muslim faith and modernity in new ways.
And a quote from Seymour Hersch, a New Yorker loony:
There’s just no serious evidence inside that Iran is actually doing anything to make a nuclear weapon.
And, similar to another Iran apologist, Juan Cole, reference to Mossad retired chief, Meir Dagan, on stupidity of a military move against Iran. But chiefly:
The nuclear bogeyman obsession has been a distraction from the need to try to tease out a relationship with Tehran, see Iran as it is.
See Iran as it is... this is the crux of the matter: this rare ability to see Iran as it is, awarded to selected few, like Sy Hersch, Juan Cole and, of course, our jolly Roger. The only problem is that many people see it differently, like in this, to take one of hundreds examples:
Iran has accelerated efforts to develop a long-range ballistic missile, despite tough international sanctions imposed a year ago, the Israeli newspaper Haaretz has reported, citing an unpublished report by U.N. experts.
And:
These accounts coincide with a third U.N. report, by the International Atomic Energy Agency, dated May 24 that indicated the Iranians may be close to producing a nuclear warhead that could be carried by their intermediate-range ballistic weapons.
And:
IAEA Director General Yukiya Amano said in the nine-page report his information was Iran has tested and manufactured the shaped explosives used with enriched uranium to create the critical mass that generates a nuclear explosion. He also cited information that Iran had redesigned the nose cone of the Shehab-3 so it could carry a nuclear warhead rather than one containing conventional high explosives.
But all this is, of course, just more war drums from the Zionist warmongers and their Pentagon ZOG puppets... ehehe. And, of course, the Zionist-friendly stooges in UN.

Well, what can I say about our jolly Roger. Another image - that of a habitual barroom brawler that picks himself up from the floor, wipes (with his sleeve, of course) the blood and snot from his damaged face and, with an appropriate war cry, stumbles back into the fray - comes to mind. No matter that the aftermath will be new "mea culpa" and broken bones - after a recovery, he will be back again, in the same old barroom...

So, a repeat requires another repeat, and I don't see any need to apologize. Here it is, to be repeated each time Mr Cohen repeats his BS:

Roger Cohen is just another link in the long chain of the fellow travelers (or useful idiots, take your pick), one of whom produced that masterpiece in 1924 for NYT:

Sad.


Judeopundit's view of same story.

Cross-posted on Yourish.com

19 June 2011

Iran To Send Monkey Into Space

Surely you are familiar with the specimen to be sent off:


What with the brawl between Mahmoud the Mad and his spiritual leader... And in related news:

Man Shoots Finger Off To Get Rid Of Wart

Like in the previous case, the separation may be painful, but beneficial for all parties concerned.

Cottage cheese, Israeli consumers, masochism

The story raging now in Israeli media is proving again two main points: the power of publicity and the innate masochism of Israeli consumer. It started several years ago, when our government, in its infinite wisdom, has lifted price control from some dairy products, cottage cheese* included. Naturally, the prices started to climb, more than doubling for cottage cheese, to take one example. So, a group of folks has created a stir, using (of course) Facebook as a vehicle. I am not offering a link here, since it's in Hebrew anyway.

The campaign brought results fairly quickly, getting the media involved, see an example here. Of course, our enlightened politicos are riding the cheesy waves to the utmost.

But the most amazing part of the story was its marketing outcome. As heard on the radio today: the sales of cottage cheese have jumped 25 to 50 %%, depending on the chain that reported the situation. Is there a lesson in this story? You bet.

Update: The boycott has started working,  after the initial fiasco.

(*) Cottage cheese in Israel: yep, it's good, and compared to the gooey stuff sold in US and UK it's superb. No offense intended, people, seriously, but you are eating something that would better be used in construction or somewhat...

Know your Jihadis better

Tee hee... exquisite.

Bar Rafaeli breaks arm, Mossad and DiCaprio cleared of suspicion

Details.

18 June 2011

It would have been funny

If it weren't so sad:

Nato has accused Libyan leader Col Muammar Gaddafi of using mosques and children's parks as shields as his forces "systematically and brutally" attack the Libyan people.

The statement came in response to Libyan charges that Nato deliberately targeted civilian buildings.
Reminds ya"ll of something?

Hint: Judge Gold.....

Mea Shearim rabbinical court, dogs, lawyers, slow days

A Jewish rabbinical court condemned to death by stoning a stray dog it feared was the reincarnation of a lawyer who insulted its judges, reports say. This is the most read story on BBC now. Must be a real slow day.

Yep, the Mea Shearim rabbinical court is a tough bunch of generally unsympathetic anti-Zionist ultra-orthodox jerk-offs. I can't imagine what they would do to a dog were it infested not by a lawyer's but by a reporter's soul...

Update: See a separate opinion by Judeopundit.

Steak Made from Human Excrement: Is It Safe?

Should it be the first question one should ask when offered one of these? Dunno.

Sexist police and reporters of Corpus Christi

I read this report, titled Woman tells Corpus Christi police she was texting when she hit the police cruiser, with growing sense of uneasiness. Here is some of it:

An officer with a ride-a-long passenger were stopped at the red light at Everhart Road and South Padre Island Drive just after 1 a.m. when they were struck from behind. The officer said the female driver appeared drunk, but she denied drinking and said she texting. The woman was taken to Christi Spohn Hospital Shoreline for minor injuries and to have a blood specimen taken. Police said the 45-year-old woman was charged with suspicion of driving while intoxicated/open alcohol container.
I have counted, and the word "woman" appears four times in this short news item. Not including the "female driver", of course.

Were the driver male or Baptist or Muslim or Native American, how many times one of these would have appeared? What is wrong with the word "person" or "driver", for crying out loud?

Bleh...

You can say it again, Guardian

Please take a look at the snapshot below and take a guess: what could make The Guardian so happy that they've decided to put up the same article twice on the page, albeit under slightly different headlines?


No prizes, sorry.

17 June 2011

"Where's my gold bars?", asks future POTUS

It is with quiet glee and intense happiness that I've perused this article.

Are the gold bars in Fort Knox really made of the precious metal? Or has the U.S. government secretly sold off the nation's stockpile and replaced it with metal bars that are only painted gold?

Ron Paul wants to find out.

Giving legitimacy to an Internet conspiracy theory that the gold in Fort Knox is fake, the iconoclast Republican congressman from Texas has asked adminstration officials to audit the purity of the nation's 700,000 gold bars held in Fort Knox, according to an internal Treasury document obtained by CNBC.
Then I have called my supervisor (well, there is still one, my rank in the Elders' HQ notwithstanding) and received a special permission to go public on this subject. So, here we go.

It is not a secret that chief of Federal Reserve is usually Jewish. Many fine upstanding citizens complained and are complaining about it, to no avail of course. What was a secret until now is that every new Fed chief goes through extensive and exhausting program of athletic training prior to getting the job. I suspect that some of you may have already guessed the reason for it. Indeed, schlepping the fake "gold" bars into Fort Knox and getting the true ones out, all that during the night, is not an easy task. If you appreciate that a gold bar weighs 27.5 pounds and consider the fact that every morning the chief has to be in the office, bright and chirpy, you will understand why we replace them so frequently. No, it's not because of the cushy job with great benefits, I can tell you that much...

Well, by now the story bears telling, since a) many of you suspected so anyway and b) the job is finished, to Elders' HQ full satisfaction. We left a few real gold bars here and there, for the usual ole spot check (to be conducted by the chief of Federal Reserve, of course, so we've marked these bars by a Star of David). Otherwise, all the good stuff is located now under a certain ugly (some even say ugliest) building in Jerusalem.

As for that:
The Treasury document says it would cost about $15 million to conduct an audit. The process would take about 30 minutes to verify the gold content of each bar, or 350,000 man hours; to do that would would take 400 people working for six months, according to the document.
Really, you should save the money. If this guy become president, he may need it.

So, to take a look backward with some satisfaction:
  • 2000 - getting to dominate the world: check.
  • 2011 - finishing relocation of the Fort Knox gold: check
  • 2011 - upsetting Ron Paul's digestion: check
  • 2020 - so far confidential, but we'll get there, no doubt.
But, on the bonus side - you could still get this guy for POTUS, you know:

Brr...

Cross-posted on Yourish.com

The Council Has Spoken!

Here are this week’s full results:

Council Winners

Non-Council Winners

See you next week..and Happy Father’s Day!

16 June 2011

Congratulations to Ayman al-Zawahiri with promotion

I always had this gentleman in high esteem - witness this What a man! post of five years back and notice this indentation on his forehead:













The last I heard he was able to stop an RPG rocket with his forehead. It remains to be seen how he deals with a Hellfire. Or with a pissed off SEAL.

And, for his own good, I hope he negotiated up the number of virgins. A man like this (PBUH) needs (and deserves) a lot of care in the other world.

Osama's stiff and Bill Warren's alternatives

That one was guarantied to get me going:

A California diver and treasure hunter hopes to find evidence of the death of al-Qaida leader Osama bin Laden by scanning the Arabian Sea with sonar.

"I am serious about this, I am not joking," Bill Warren, a 59-year-old professional diver from San Diego, told the German Press Agency DPA. "The main motivation is to try to see if my president was really telling the truth and if bin Laden is truly dead on the bottom of the ocean."
So, of course, I have started to check the possible alternatives:

1. POTUS  told the truth

   1.1 Bill finds Osama intact
   1.2 Allah took Osama to his place, soul and stiff included. Bill decides that POTUS lied
   1.3 Bill finds Osama partially consumed by local fauna, cannot identify him, decides that POTUS lied
   1.4. Bill doesn't find Osama, decides that POTUS lied 

2. POTUS lied

   2.1 Osama is alive and frolics elsewhere
   2.2 Osama died years ago of gout (not to be confused with goat) 
   2.3 There wasn't any Osama, it was a Mossad simulacrum to start with
   2.4 Osama is on the bottom of the ocean, but not dead, leading an underwater Jihad. Kills Bill
   2.5 Osama is dead but instead of the bottom of the ocean the stiff is in Camp David, in the trophies room
   2.6 Osama is dead, but the stiff was traded to a foreign collector (Putin?) for another rare specimen, such as Yeti, Bigfoot, Jimmy Hoffa, Lenin, ...

So, we have now a total of 10 possible outcomes, with only 1 (one) favoring the POTUS, Assigning equal weight to every possible outcome (no reason not to), we come out with 9/10 = 90 % probability that Bill will conclude that POTUS is lying.

All things considered, Bill could very well call off his expedition and save the investors their dough.

He won.

We told you: NO PARKING!

(Click to embiggen)

Thanks to Y.Z.

Lunar eclipse June 15, 2011

From somewhere in Israel. Only slightly processed.






The red in the last pictures (high exposure) is due to volcanic ash clouds coming from Eritrea eruption.

15 June 2011

Ticketed for Eating Doughnuts? Oi...

This tragic story is another illustration of another draconian regulation out of the deluge descending on the good citizens of New York City.

2 women in Brooklyn receive citations for sitting on playground bench to snack
Watch that clip if you want, but the quote tells the story. My heart goes out to New Yorkers who are being smothered by the Big Brother.

I even consider to have a pastrami sandwich with beer, followed by a cigarette at one of these playgrounds. See what develops. Riot police with dogs? Helicopters?

Now there is another idea for a playground activity:



What would be the response to this one? Bloomberg in person with a machine gun?

Do lesbians exist?

Or are they just a rumor, like Yeti or Bigfoot, supported by a few ardent believers and writers of erotic fiction?

Just asking.

The Real Paula Brooks.

Hat Tip: Theo.

14 June 2011

QED: documents show Assad behind Nakba Day raids on Golan Heights

Not that there ever was a doubt, but here it is.

A word of comfort to parishioners on disappearance of relic of St. Anthony

Dear all,

I have read where it says that parishioners at a Southern California Catholic church are praying to the patron saint of lost causes and missing objects for its speedy return.

And I say unto thee: be staunch of heart and strong of belief! The inconvenience is only a passing breeze upon the brow of eternity. Verily St. Anthony, the patron saint of lost causes and missing objects, will take care of his own relic.

That is, if the relic is not fake, of course. And re this:

People here are pretty upset but they're praying. They're praying to St. Anthony for the return of his own object.
No need, really. He knows and will take care.

Where is the basic human decency?

Asks Greg. Read this. Now, when they say in Texas about a person "he needs killing", I hope you know what they mean.

As for the other question Greg asks: "And why are such things apparently still socially acceptable in a way that such abuse towards minority groups is not?" - I believe that I have a glimmer of an answer. While the veneer of political correctness (that powers that be are enforcing by all possible means) is strong enough to make us utter only the right words about minorities, it is only skin deep. This veneer doesn't make up for our animal behavior, as witness the case(s) Greg describes. It doesn't convert us from apes to men. No way.

Too bad.

South Sudan: where Jimmy Carter treads

The strife in Southern Sudan reaches new peak:

As many as 40,000 people may have fled fighting in Sudan's South Kordofan state, the UN has said.

"Of the Kadugli population, estimated at 60,000, between 30,000 to 40,000 people are now believed to have fled the town," Elisabeth Byrs, spokeswoman of the UN Office for the Co-ordination of Humanitarian Affairs, told reporters in Geneva on Friday.

Another 100,000 people, most of them ethnically southern Dinka Ngok farmers, have fled to the south from the contested Abyei border region nearby since it was overrun by northern troops on May 21, according to UN estimates.
So, in the midst of the war, who is going to remember the prophetic (as usual) words:
Former U.S. President Jimmy Carter, meanwhile, said Sudanese President Omar al-Bashir told him that Southern Sudan should not have to shoulder Sudan's debt should it secede from the county. The question of how to split Sudan's debt is one of several issues that would have to be resolved if the south votes for independence, as is widely expected.
The man is really casting a deathly shadow on all the places he visits.

13 June 2011

Tom MacMaster, the Gay Girl of Damascus

There was a young girl of Damascus
Who dated whoever would ask her
But only at night,
Cause early and bright
She turned to a fat man - all ass-kew.

Matthew Hess: rabid, but how rabid he is indeed?

Due to circumstances out of anyone's control, the last week has acquired a definitely penile... er... flavor, so to say. To mention only two headlines, such as Watcher’s Council Nominations: Erections Have Consequences Edition and Weiner Comes Clean But Doesn’t Resign. But still my attention was on another penile subject, that of the Intactivists, the relentless fighters against male circumcision and their intrepid leader, Matthew Hess.

To start with, a few disclaimers:

  1. While a Jew, I am not a religious one. I am not saying this to make proud or to apologize, just as an input data item, useful or not - up to you.
  2. I don't have a horse in the race on circumcision. While I have been following the religious dictate as far as my progeny is concerned, I can take it or leave it, thousands years of tradition and whatnot notwithstanding.
  3. I (and other, less active, participants in this here blog) do take utmost care with the battle cry "Antisemitism", trying to use it sparingly and only in clear-cut cases. Hitler and David Duke come to mind easily, but of course, there are many, many more out there, sadly. On the other hand, there are some gray areas better to be avoided for lack of clarity and proof.
When the glaringly antisemitic cartoon courtesy of Matthew Hess was published, it didn't leave any wiggle room to anyone. Gray area it certainly ain't and the case is as clear-cut as possible. So there. But still, something intangible caused me to seek more material on Mr Hess. For, you see, there are some contradictory notions regarding this gentleman.

First of all, let's see what Matthew Hess has to say about himself. On his care2 page, he characterizes his own stance on male circumcision as "rabid":


His professional life (if "life" is a fitting term in this case), as it is described by himself, looks singularly focused on the same appendage:


The term "rabid" (Marked by excessive enthusiasm for and intense devotion to a cause or idea) that Mr Hess uses to describe himself is, accidentally or not, used as well by Dr. George Kaplan, a urologist with Rady Children’s Specialists of San Diego Medical Foundation: "There are people who are rabidly anti-circumcision, and I use that word purposely."

In the article linked above, written by Dave Maass, there is a lot of useful information on the whole issue. For the purpose of this post, which is an attempt to understand the Matthew Hess phenomena, the most important part is provided by our hero himself, and it's nothing less than full disclosure of the circumstances that lead Mr Hess to his all-consuming obsession.
Matthew Hess, a Pacific Beach resident who recently turned 40, remembers the first time he saw another kid’s “intact” penis. He was 8.

“I actually didn’t register it at the time that I had been circumcised,” Hess says. “I just thought his penis was naturally different somehow. I just thought, ‘That’s not like mine. That’s different. I like mine better.’”

Hess has since changed his mind and engages in therapies to “restore” his foreskin.

“I was in my late 20s when I just started to notice a slow decline in sensation,” Hess says. “Year after year, it started to get a worse and worse after sex. I went to a urologist, and he didn’t have much of an answer. It struck me that my circumcision could have something to do with this. I researched online and quickly found a lot of information about what’s lost. That made me pretty angry.”
Yeah. Obviously no one cared to explain to Mr Hess that over-enthusiastic use of that appendage may indeed cause a marked diminishing of the sensation after years of such use. But, I guess, even if somebody did explain, it would have been too late, because the obsession has already taken over. And obsessions have a mind of their own. At least we were given an insight into the real source of the problem that consumes Matt's waking hours.

The cause of his personal anguish notwithstanding, Matthew Hess presents quite a pathetic image. I shall borrow a piece of Fresno Zionism post:
Here is a photo of Matthew Hess, leader of the movement, holding a device that supposedly can be used to create a foreskin on a circumcised penis (in the words of the immortal Dave Barry, I Am Not Making This Up):
Matthew Hess, leader of anti-circumcision movement, with penis-stretching device
                                Matthew Hess, leader of anti-circumcision                movement, with penis-stretching device
Very funny. But plenty of idiots take it seriously. You can actually buy one of these devices. There are ‘before’ and ‘after’ pictures at the site. Unbelievable.
The picture of the chief Intactivist becomes more and more pitiful as the details surface, you would agree. However, until now, the means he and his followers employed in the service of the cause, were exceedingly poor, as you can ascertain viewing this example:



Even if I were a rabid enthusiast of the cause, I would have been discouraged by the singularly soporific manner of the voice-over. I bet one could put more feeling in recitation of a Yellow pages' contents.

Being obsessed, Mr Hess doesn't mind playing loose with facts. The main part of his position statement on male circumcision reads:
Although legal protection of only girls from circumcision would seem to violate the equal protection clause of the Fourteenth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution, the fact remains that it is still widely considered to be legal in this country to mutilate a boy's genitals in the name of social custom, hygiene, religion, or any other reason. This is true despite the well documented lifelong damage that male circumcision causes each of its victims.
Which is an intentional misdirection, because AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) stance on the practice at the moment is neutral, and is not likely to change in the direction Mr Hess would prefer - just the opposite, judging by the news.

So, all in all, the case trumpeted my Intactivists was quite a moribund one before the story of the antisemitic cartoons exploded. In a way, choosing an obviously antisemitic trope for the cartoon was similar to Mel Gibson's trick of creating a publicity storm around his infamous movie. But is it so simple? On the face of it, one can't escape the feeling that the whole affair has a strong smell of a contrived, spoof-like action. Two different bloggers wonder about this. However, one of them offers another bizarre explanation of the antisemitic escapade:
My reader also warns of a new breed of anti-Semite I couldn’t have dreamed up in a million years:
In this instance, I think it’s yet a third kind of acceptable anti-Semitism, a little-known one yet one that is persistent especially in California: Gay activist anti-Semitism. A certain subset of gays are strong “uncut” proponents and want all penises to have foreskins because they prefer them that way, and so try to force the world to comply; when they get the biggest pushback from Jewish groups, their frustration turns to hatred.

I have no idea if he’s right. (I certainly don’t pretend to know anything about Matthew Hess’s sexual orientation.) But if he is — wow. Isn’t anti-Semitism supple? Isn’t it versatile? It slices, it dices, it makes Julienne fries! Historically, it’s proven able to provide a solution and an explanation for anything, even mediocre sex. Speaking from the Jewish side of my family, I quote the Scots: Whae’s like us? Damn few, an’ they’re a’ deid.
Wow indeed. Curiosier and curiosier...

An interesting response from Matthew Hess to a direct question about his perceived anti-Semitism:"A lot of people have said that, but we're not trying to be anti-Semitic." Does "not trying" mean that he already is anti-Semitic enough or that he is, indeed, truly unaware of the anti-Semitic flavor of his creation?

And, to top the accumulated list of mysteries, a quote from an (unnamed) Jewish affairs advocate:
“We have not uncovered any kind of bigotry in their background or anything like that,” said the advocate. “That said, it seems that they are so fanatical in the belief of their cause that they are just either willfully blind or willfully ignorant to the fact that they have stooped to trafficking in these really hateful tropes.”
E.g., while the cartoons are clearly anti-Semitic, there is no bigotry in the perpetrators' past. Go figure...

So, while the only certainty that exists re Mr Hess is that he is a fanatical (and pathetic) torch carrier for his cause, all the rest is questionable, and there are quite a few questions:
  1. Was his use of anti-Semitic tropes an intentional PR exercise? Doing a Gibson, so to say?
  2. Why didn't he use Muslim circumcision as an example for his cartoons?
  3. Did the hateful imagery come naturally to him? In other words, is he inherently anti-Semitic or (see question 1) to a degree that he isn't even aware of it?
  4. Is there indeed a Jew-hating segment of gay community or it's a figment of someone's imagination?
And, probably, more. But definitely an interesting case for an extended study...

12 June 2011

France Faces Fines For Forsaking Fauna

Fiersome. F... no, not today.

11 June 2011

Does India Need a Yuri Gagarin Monument?

Nothing against Yuri Gagarin here, but check out this:

According to Russian cosmonaut Viktor Savinykh, the city of Mumbai, India should have a monument erected in the name of the late Yuri Gagarin in order to “further boost the Indo-Soviet relationship.”
Was it the reporter or the Russian cosmonaut, but somebody needs a heads-up there: that empire is dead. Much deader than Yuri Gagarin, so live with it, folks.

Yeah, and that monument: it couldn't hurt. Go for it.

Peter Beaumont and Israel's legitimacy

Peter Beaumont, Observer's foreign affairs editor, published in The Guardian's CiF a strange piece, titled Israel's right to exist does not mean its government can act with impunity. This here blog has already had a few run-ins with Mr Beaumont, due to his strange way of interpreting some obvious facts. This recent article is not an exception, but looks much more cryptic. It starts with:

Last year the Israeli Reut Institute published a report examining what it said was the agenda for eroding Israel's legitimacy in the international arena – an aim, it argued, whose end was to turn Israel into a "pariah" state and challenge its "very legitimacy of its existence as a Jewish and democratic state".
OK, so how does the author deal with that issue? By offering a learned discourse on three "overlapping concepts" that together are supposed to cover the concept of legitimacy (by Ian Clark, author of Legitimacy in International Society).
First is the notion of the sovereign integrity of countries as states recognised by the international community and enshrined in international law.
A second notion of legitimacy – familiar and well-studied from Hobbes onwards – is the legitimacy a government claims through the support of its citizens, in the case of a democracy via an electoral mandate, to represent for a period of time the policies of a given state.
The third crucial notion of international legitimacy is Clark's category of "appropriate forms of ... conduct". It is in precisely in this area that the government, a regime or series of governments of a state can be seen to relinquish legitimacy both through its acts and how they are perceived over a period of time.
So, OK, you may ask, but where does Mr Beaumont go with these cutting edge definitions? I wish I knew is my answer. The only hint he offers is:
The distinctions are crucially important because in the deliberate conflation of the competing spheres of legitimacy by some of those who support Israel, they are making an essentially undemocratic argument utilising Israel's right to exist as an argument for impunity.
I don't know who are meant by "some of those who support Israel" and what kind of "undemocratic argument" they are making, "utilising Israel's right to exist as an argument", according to this elliptical article. And of course, impunity being so dear to my crusty Zionist soul, I smell a rat.

It (the rat) smells suspiciously similar to the one that carries the ubiquitous "I don't have anything against Jews, but them freaking Zionists..." slogan.

Oh well, let's see where it goes. Or do you already know?

Update: Much better here, by Norm. Thanks to Pisa.

Scientists show that conservatives and liberals are thick

Imagine that.

10 June 2011

What's sauce for the goose...

These two messages from two branches of female sports are in Hebrew, but the gist is:

The court of appeals of the international basketball association rejected an appeal by Israeli basketball association to allow Naama Shafir, a member of Israeli national team to play with a long-sleeved shirt under the standard jersey. The request was made due to Naama being religious...
The Iranian female football team was punished by a technical loss in its game with Jordan. The decision was made due to Iranian team members appearing for the game in hijabs.
So... yeah, reach your own conclusion. Oh, and another thing: the first article carries a picture of Naama:

While the second article offers only a generic female mannequin in a hijab:

Which is, strictly speaking, unfair to the readers. Oh well...

The Council Has Spoken!! This Week’s Watcher’s Council Results

Here are this week’s full results:

Council Winners

Non-Council Winners