14 October 2014

Timothy Bancroft-Hinchey vs Tony Abbott

Today it seems to be the day to remind you about Timothy Bancroft-Hinchey, a man of many talents I have had an opportunity to mention several times.  After dealing very harshly with so called FUKUS, Mr Bancroft-Hinchey turned his main caliber guns in the direction of the Aussies. Oh well, no one can say that Timothy isn't a busy bee. Or that he isn't a loyal attack dog of his deity, one Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin. It will be difficult to understand why poor Australia's Prime Minister Tony Abbott caused so much ire, reading Bancroft-Hinchey's article Tony Abbott: The chip on Australia's shoulder. Because first of all, our Timothy, displaying that he is in as good a fighting shape as ever, shares with us a few excellent examples of his fiery style:

I would advise Russia's President Vladimir Putin to wash his hands carefully and sterilize them after shaking the paw offered to him by Australia's Prime Minister Tony Abbott at the forthcoming G20 Summit in Brisbane. It is not about Ebola Virus Disease, it is about the disease called insolence and Australia's colonial chip on its shoulder.
Tony Abbott displays a degree of insolence, arrogance and incompetence which mirrors the intrusiveness, belligerence and chauvinism inherent in other members of the Anglo Saxon alliance in NATO.
Do you feel the energy, the unmistakable Bancroft-Hinchey's umpf? Crowning all that with:
When Australia isn't busy crawling around the legs of its colonial master, England or trying to crawl up the anatomy of London's master, Washington, participating in their wars to pick up a few crumbs thrown Canberra's way, its politicians are busy kowtowing to Europe and the USA making stupid and unfounded remarks about Russia.
Only after this avalanche of abuse, comes the reason for it:
And apart from the hand-shaking insult (I seriously hope President Putin washes his hands and sterilizes them after touching the grubby paw of Abbott), we have another example of sheer crass stupidity, namely the statement that "Russia needs to fully cooperate in the investigation into the MH17 atrocity".
Surely you would agree that Timothy deserves a treat from his master?

You can read the rest of that piece, if you can cope with all that raw power and electricity it exudes. Because, as sure as death and taxes, Timothy - aside of this avalanche of abuse, doesn't have any way to justify or circumvent the fact that a Russian missile, launched from a Russian mobile launcher by a Russian officer, downed a civilian aircraft, taking hundreds of innocent lives. Well, aside of this pathetic wail:
The answer to that bullshit is that the atrocity happened on Ukrainian soil and it is not yet clear whether the aircraft was downed by a missile possibly fired from a position behind rebel lines, possibly not, possibly fired by rebels, possibly fired by Ukrainian Government or paramilitary forces or else downed by a military aircraft flown by the Ukrainian Air Force. In fact, why has it taken the UK so long to come clean about what happened? Does it take that long to doctor the black boxes, eh whatty what?
As if all that eruption of crapola wasn't enough, Timothy kept this up, adding a few colorful ideas:
How would the average Russian respond to Tony Abbott saying he would 'shirtfront' Vladimir Putin?

Well, any Russian or anyone else for that matter would question whether Abbott made the remark before or after lunch. If he made it before lunch then either he is childish or mentally challenged and if he made it after lunch then he is incompetent.

How would Vladimir Putin react to being 'shirtfronted'?

I cannot speak for Vladimir Vladimirovich but if I were him, I’d grab the bastard that did it, slam him over my shoulder, place my boot in his face and ask “You were saying…?”

Vladimir Putin is world-renowned for his judo expertise -- would he use that on Mr Abbott if he was 'shirtfronted'?

Well, I cannot speak for President Putin but he certainly has the skills to react adequately to such an act of aggression. I am not saying he would do so, basically because Abbott wouldn’t have the guts anyway. As soon as he saw Putin looking at him he’d triple his laundry bill, suddenly turn white, sit bolt upright and go screaming over to his sister’s house to grab a clean pair of Y fronts.
Good Timothy, good boy, another treat is coming.

And, maybe, later, Vladimir Vladimirovich will let you hump his leg. Just a bit.

Now relax, relax, here is good Timothy...

Alleged mugshot of alleged Timothy Bancroft-Hinchey


Dick Stanley said...

I don't know. He's always looked dead to me.

Dick Stanley said...

The chilling part is that after all this time, so little is still said about the shoot-down of an airliner full of civilians.

Dick Stanley said...

What is that creature on his head, anyhow?

SnoopyTheGoon said...

Possibly undead?

SnoopyTheGoon said...

Well, once it is Russia (or China) then it's not a news item.

SnoopyTheGoon said...

One of the furry animals, I bet. And possibly dyed.

Dick Stanley said...

Maybe it's eating his brain, such as it is.

SnoopyTheGoon said...

Let's hope, although hard to imagine a living thing so much lacking a sense of revulsion ;-)