28 May 2007

THE SATANIC GOVERNMENT'S SATANIC WAR

This plea for help that appeared here, strangely touched me in a new way. I am even going to quote here some especially strong and vibrant passages of the whole. To start with:

This SATANIC JEWISH NEW WORLD ORDER AGENDA has FIRST AND FOREMOST been implemented to destroy the credibility of Raymond Ronald Karczewski©, a LIVING CHRIST, who has recently experienced a Christly epiphany which allowed him to directly discern that he is Jesus of Nazareth Reincarnated. His heavy use of Morphine Sulfate allowed him to experience this epiphany and has been the subject of ridicule by numerous Alcohol Soaked/Narcotic Dithered Satanic Ignoramuses/Spiritual Pipsqueaks/Vampiric Yahoos who run roughshod over these Usenet Newsgroups and Internet Forums.
I am not surprised by the absolute precision of the diagnosis: after all, we, the Elders, are not exactly hiding the simple fact that we have taken over the management of the world affairs starting Jan. 1, 2000. I am also guilty in soaking myself in Alcohol and that other Narcotic at any opportunity (right now I have finished my smoking break, so what else do you need in the way of proof?).
"No other man but I in the recorded History of mankind, including JESUS CHRIST, has directly revealed to the World the SATANIC WEAPON used to enslave mankind -- INTELLECTUAL THOUGHT!!" -- Raymond Ronald Karczewski©, Jesus of Nazareth Reincarnated.
Too true. Them intellectual four-eyed drink-soaked spiritual pipsqueaks are pure poison for mankind.

Anyhow, I don't know about you (read the whole manifesto first, please!), but I am sold. The drudgery of Elders' conquest and mayhem has started to wear me out, and I am in need of a new spiritual pathway. So, after this quick decision I would like to turn to business at hand. It is rather a delicate situation, since the requirements are stated unequivocally:
The following suggested donations and donation levels are listed for your convenience: Please contribute all you can to help in the fight to incarcerate SATANIC ENEMIES OF A CHRIST.

$5 - Associates of a Christ $25 - Friends of a Christ $100 - Christly Benefactor $500 - Vice Priest in the Holy Church of the Mirror of Truth $1000 - High Priest in the Holy Church of the Mirror of Truth $10000 - Brother of a Christ
I want to be as direct as possible: due to being Jewish, I can hardly apply for all the roles from an Associate to High Priest. But, seeing as Christ himself was Jewish, I am quite sure that Brother of Christ is the job that is meant for me! The only hitch is that I am in a quite stressed situation where my liquidity is concerned (the Elders' wages are not what they are used to be in the days before the World conquest).

So, instead of paying for the job, I have rather hoped for a (humble, no need to be extravagant) stipend on account of becoming a second-highest dignitary in the Holy Church of the Mirror of Truth.

I sincerely hope that this offer will be seriously considered by the Jesus of Nazareth Reincarnated himself. Taking into account the wisdom of getting rid of an implacable and dangerous foe (I am being humble here) and gaining a powerful friend, my offer comes cheap.

Otherwise, I shall forever remain an Alcohol Soaked/Narcotic Dithered Satanic Ignoramus, Spiritual Pipsqueak and Vampiric Yahoo hell-bent upon destroying the above named enterprise, SnoopyTheGoon©
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