03 October 2012

Rush Limbaugh says Obama manipulated hurricane forecasts

The full headline reads "Rush Limbaugh says Obama manipulated hurricane forecasts to delay GOP convention"*.

I like nothing more than a good conspiracy theory, but with due respect (?) to Rush, he went seriously wrong. The truth is that (take some air before you read the rest):

Obama manipulated the hurricane itself!

Conspiracy Planet (google for it yourself, we don't link to places like this) says:

The CIA uses stolen Tesla technology, according to Skorzeny, to spy on Americans and manipulate the weather. There are thousands of satellites orbiting the earth that project high intensity positively charged laser beams to certain areas on the earth. These positively charged laser beams enable the New Word Order Nazis/C.I.A. to use their stolen Tesla Technology to manipulate the weather & to transmit extremely low frequency "elf" waves with subliminal messages for mind control purposes.
Of course, the know-nothing author of the text above doesn't know that Tesla borrowed the technology from the ancient order of Sampliers which, in turn, employed Leonardo to restore the even more ancient scheme of that infernal machine, made in the usual easygoing manner by King Solomon on a wall of his favorite wife's room. And the King himself... oh well, it's too long a story.

Anyway, Obama was just perpetrating a friendly prank, borrowing a few HAARP machines which are anyway almost** unused.

So there.

(*) And the article was linked from Fox News, incidentally.

(**) Not now, please. 

4 comments:

Shaun Downey said...

Limbaugh is another who should be displayed at a natural history museum as an example of a perfect arsehole.On the other hand he's far from alone. Perhaps pair him with Galloway and see if they mate

SnoopyTheGoon said...

Oh boy... what an idea... I shudder.

Dick Stanley said...

To paraphrase an old friend of mine, a retired FBI agent: The CIA couldn't find its ass with both hands.

SnoopyTheGoon said...

That's so true. All of the spooks, I suspect, are the same way.