Che Guevara is Jewish. It is final.

Some people expressed their disbelief in our latest notice to the world about this, hitherto controversial, character. Since the day of publication of this momentous article, our field operatives have been very busy in the field (where they belong, instead of raiding the department fridge and ogling my secretary). Of course, due to the secrecy that surrounded the Jewish connection of the Commandante, the task is not easy. But the first ironclad piece of evidence eventually surfaced in the archives of the Jerusalem central yeshiva of religious-Zionist movement - Yeshivat Merkaz Ha Rav. To remind you, this is where Che spent the happiest year of his short but eventful life, totally engrossed in the ancient wisdom of the Hebrews, frequently forgetting the most sacred ritual of the yeshiva - the meal times.

As any yeshiva student, Che had to carry a student ID card - both for security reasons and to prevent the entrance of freeloaders. And it was our unbelievable luck to locate this card with a (low quality, but clear enough at that) picture of Che.

We have also located the photographer who has taken the picture (after Che spent a month in hiding, growing his hair according to the obligatory fashion). The red background, it was explained, served as the best measure to hide the location, the time of the day and the surrounding scenery that could have been otherwise discovered by CIA and KGB. On the other hand, the new image of Che was an ideal one for hiding from the above mentioned unmentionables - who would look twice at a yeshiva student when seeking the fiery Commandante?

It is very possible that in the next newsflash we'll present the rabbinical diploma of Che (it is a very rare case when an especially gifted student finishes the studies and is able to pass the final exams in one year). We are currently in the difficult, but nonetheless enjoyable process of turning the screws on the Mossad Chief Archivist. Soon...

***