That little UCI chameleon

Where do you hide a leaf? In a tree, of course. It is kindergarten stuff.

Where do you hide a Jew? No, not in the woods, Jews don't take to the woods willingly - unless forced to. The right answer is: in UCI or, in simple words - UC Irvine, the infamous branch of Californian higher education that is a nest of so rabid anti-Israeli and anti-Semitic sentiment, that even the the US Senate Judiciary Committee was forced to deal with it (there is a lot more info on the goings-on in UCI, but google for it yourself - we are concerned with the Hiding Of The Jew here.)

So how does a Jew hide himself? First of all, by adjusting his external "look and feel". To start with - that dead giveaway Levine (or Levin) surname you grandpa brought upon your head - wouldn't it be better to call yourself LeVine? Tres chic - and some people may even decide you are French, and the sky is your limit then! In addition, you assume an image of an olden times hippie - to make your students feel easier with you, of course:

I've never been around UCI campus so I can't tell - maybe they still think they are in the sixties, but in any case its' a bit pathetic, so enough with look and feel.

But that's all external. What's important for you, if you want to hide real well, is to absorb that for which UCI is so famous. You start about here:

Q: Do you think there is an issue with anti-Semitism here at UC Irvine?

A: I think in the fullest sense of the word-that is, bigotry against people of Semitic descent, which could include Jews, Arabs and Muslims, and of course, some Jews are Arabs and some Arabs are Christian, so these identities are not hard and fast, there is.

How do you like that answer by a learned professor? I don't know about you, but if I wanted to play a senile octogenarian (no offense to octogenarians intended, a lot of octogenarians would have found a better answer, I am more than sure), this is what I would have chosen for an answer. With some drooling on my shirt, to be sure. In the fullest sense of drooling too...

But of course the above quote is too feeble for full success in the make-up of a good chameleon. Professor LeVine could do much better, and he does much better:

As far as I can see, the only party that benefits from Gemayel's assassination is Israel.

In HuffPost, too... oh well, what wouldn't people do for fame, love and make-up?

But the above, if you wish, is not a libel - it's just a working theory, no need for proof and hardly a basis for legal proceedings. Rest assured, our professor can do better yet, and here it comes - a piece in Al Jazeera (nice venue, ain't it?). It's a long article, full or usual tropes so beloved by the recent anti-Israeli propaganda that it's hardly worth your time - maybe somebody else could wade through all this patiently. But one passage riveted the attention of Michael Brenner, a lawyer and a blogger (and many other nice things, no doubt). Here is that passage:

Additionally, numerous flippant remarks by senior Israeli politicians and generals, including Tzipi Livni, the foreign minister, refusing to make a distinction between civilian people and institutions and fighters - "Hamas doesn't ... and neither should we" is how Livni puts it - are rightly being seen as admissions of war crimes.

Michael, understandably, was fired up by this obviously criminal remark coming from one of our current VIPs (wouldn't you?). So, being a careful person (and a lawyer, lest you forget), he decided to check the whole story, and found indeed that Ms Livni doesn't want to make a distinction... between Israeli Arabs and Israeli Jews. Here comes the real McCoy:

Foreign Minister Tzipi Livni said during the meeting, "On my way here I heard that Hamas declared the man killed by a rocket in Ashkelon 'one of the Zionists' despite being an Israeli Arab. They don't make a distinction, and neither should we."

I don't think that this quote requires an explanation. But its' equally easy to see what happens when one takes (on purpose, of course) the last sentence out of the context. It is a sad fact that it was taken out of the context and used in the not-quite friendly to Israel way by a Jew. But let's not forget the wider context - the Hiding Of The Jew!

Blood libel against a Jew is not exactly a new thing, but it's done by another Jew in this case. Unfortunately it is quite popular in the last quarter of the XX century and is becoming more popular now with other chameleons on various campuses.

What else about the story? Michael Brenner wrote an exceedingly polite message to professor LeVine, expressing his doubts about the veracity of the quote in the Al Jazeera article. Mr Levine responded by several garbled messages that look like something produced in a thick haze of some controlled substance - no, I am not making any allegations here, it is just that... oh what the heck - it looks even more pathetic than the first quote in this post, and it's a pity I cannot produce the texts here. I would be glad to, but I have to get Michael's permission to do so first.

Well, what can I say for a conclusion? If I were an anti-Israeli (let alone anti-Semitic) student in UCI... No, even better - if I were a whole gang of anti-Israeli students of UCI, I would make professor LeVine our totem. Being carried on a pole, fed constantly and prayed to as a minor deity. And anointed (er... shmeared in simple words) - by oils, aromatic or other, and don't forget the animal fat - it works on a minor deity anytime.

Make it (the fat) kosher halal, though...

Cross-posted on Yourish.com.